Q. I am not sure if the group is right for me. What should I do?
If you are uncertain for whatever reason, please give us a call and we can describe what the group is like which can help you decide if you want to come along or not. You are welcome to attend a group to see if it feels right for you.
Q. Is there a fee to attend?
No, the support groups are a free service provided by VANISH. If you wish to contribute you are welcome to bring some biscuits or a snack to share.
Q. I can’t get to the group at the starting time, would that be OK?
We prefer that everyone arrives on time so as not to miss the opening comments and introductions. If you wish to come late, please let us know in advance and we can mention it to the other participants at the beginning.
Q. Can I bring a friend or family member or carer to support me?
Our groups are for individuals with a lived experience so if you want to bring someone with you, please let us know in advance and we will discuss this with you. We always ask the permission of the group and respect their wishes.
Q. I haven’t decided yet whether I want to search, would the group be suitable for me?
Yes, our groups are not just for those who are searching or who have searched, they are to support any individual who would like to talk about or explore their experience.
Q. I really need help with my family relationships – is the group suitable for me?
Yes, you are likely to gain insights and support by attending a group. However the support groups are not a substitute for personal counselling so if you are not sure please do not hesitate to call us.
Q. I find it difficult to talk sometimes. What if I get emotional?
You are not required to speak if you prefer not to. Our groups are a safe space to express yourself without fear of being judged. It is common to become emotional and you will be supported if this happens. If you become angry, we encourage you to express this in ways which do not cause fear or upset to the other participants.
Q. What if I get need support in the days following the group?
You are welcome to contact us for support following attending a group, regardless of the cause. Participants tell us that they only realise they are upset after the group so it can help to talk this through.
Q. I am a mother whose child was adopted. Which group would be best for me?
The mixed group is open to all individuals with an adoption experience. Mothers (sometimes called natural mothers or birth mothers) are welcome to attend.
Q. I am a father whose child was adopted. Which group would be best for me?
The mixed group is open to all individuals with an adoption experience. Fathers (sometimes called natural fathers or birth fathers) are welcome to attend.
Q. I am an adoptive parent, which group would be best for me?
The mixed group is open to all individuals with an adoption experience. Adoptive parents are welcome to attend.